Hygge- Why You Need it on PJSC podcast

First, I’d better tell you what hygge (pronounced hue-guh) means: it is a Danish word to describe a special moment or feeling.  There is no English equivalent word, but several put together can approximate this concept- cosiness, charm, happiness, ‘contentness’, security, familiarity, comfort, reassurance, kinship, and simpleness.

And so, the conscious creation of a special moment in a certain time and place that such a wonderful feeling of intimacy and friendliness- that is hygge!  To me, it is a type of motionless, indoor forest walking; consciously becoming one with your simple environment and your companions in a moment of shared contentedness.  I like the concept of ‘cozy’ most of all- as in Dicken’s A Christmas Carol, when Scrooge is shown by the ghost of Christmas Present the little kitchen of Bob Cratchett, in which sits his entire family including Tiny Tim.  The kitchen is humble, and the family is poor, but they are all happy together, celebrating their thrifty Christmas dinner.  Scrooge is touched, he doesn’t know it, but he is witnessing Hygge, Victorian English style!

It is thought that the long, sunless winters in Denmark gave birth to this concept of the preciousness of hygge.  Small, delightful moments in one’s life can illuminate both the mind and spirit in the midst of even an otherwise gloomy existence!  Sprinkle enough bright moments throughout your day, and then each and every day can be a delight, filled with times to cherish.

My Christmas was absolutely wonderful this year, filled with a snowy landscape, candles in all the windows, and my family, both grandchildren included, playing with their presents about the tree.  I grilled a ham, slathered in orange marmalade, (I know, not too paleo, but it was Christmas!), and we had mashed sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, and we’re all so full that no one wanted dessert- although we were able to eat some chocolates from the Sweet Shop in La Crosse’s north side, which were amazing.  They make their own candies with equipment that must have come from Dicken’s London, with real ingredients, from scratch!

Needless to say, that is a day of endless Hygge!  It is so much, that it wears you out, and you are happy to fall into bed.  But now, two days later: a day long rain has come, and the temps are in the 40’s- unheard of at this time in Wisconsin!  The snow has been washed away, but I have achieved hygge several times already today, even though it is still raining, and dark now, at 4:30 PM.  The electric candles in all the windows, and the lit Christmas tree helps, as did my book reading in my favorite easy chair, feet up and a cup of green tea by my side.  My wife sleeping on the couch, with two sleeping felines, one on the couch back, the other on her leg, and a small space heater blowing gently onto us both.  And I had just before gone down to the cellar, doing pushups on my gymnastic rings, and flies, and rows, then a series of isometric presses on the power rack- and so now, I was deliciously exhausted and content- hygge!

And so, you see you can achieve this state of hygge almost anywhere, if you set your mind to it.  It takes no money, very little time, and does wonders for your mood and state of mind- it’s rather like a form of meditation or prayer.  An attitude of gratefulness permeates you’re entire being.

I remember years ago, when I was a mailman.  It was a rainy, cold winter day, much like today, and I was soaked through.  I had heated up my lunch using the microwave at the old folk’s home on my route, and had parked along the shoreline of Lake Onalaska on a dead end road.  The dark waves tossed before me, and I cranked the heater in that mail truck onto high.  I unpacked my lunch of a small steak and veggies, mixed into white rice, and lit a small candle that I kept in my truck.  

That did it!  As the steam rose from the drying raincoat I had taken off and that was hanging beside me, I tasted the wonderful food, as the candle flame shed a golden glow across the drab interior of that ancient truck.  I didn’t see an eagle that day as I ate (I often did), but still, although I didn’t know the word to describe my feeling at that time, I do now-  HYGGE.

Sometimes, just BE! pqtd podcast

Now, I’m not trying purposely to be vague here.  Actually, this is a quite specific recommendation- often, we need to be reminded that we do not need to be struggling wildly, spinning our wheels attempting to make the greatest gains, the best accomplishments of our lives, because; well- time is all we’ve got!

Last week I was reminded of this, as I got quite sick, and stayed that way for a solid week!  

Now, this is a rarity for me.  Probably for your too, if you make your health a real priority in your life, trying to always get at least 8 hours of sleep, eat a paleo diet, and exercise intensely, yet briefly, on a regular basis.  I fact, right now I can’t recall the last time I got sick!  It really is usually less than one time per year, and then only for a day or two…

Except this time.  I know what it stemmed from, as I was forced to be outside in freezing rain and cold for hours, at night (I rarely stay up late at night), and was coupled with extreme exertion!  I remember thinking ‘If I am exposed right now to something bad (I was in a large crowd as well), I know I am driving those toxins right deep into my body.’   

And that is exactly what happened!  I got so ill that all I could do was lay in my chair, covered with a sleeping bag and with an electric heater aimed at my prone form, as I just lay there- day after day.  I tried to sleep in my bed, but aside wanting to spare exposing my wife to my toxic self- there was to be no sleep for me!  I coughed and sneezed too much, and constantly needed to be blowing my nose, over and over…  

What a nightmare.  

And you know what?  As I lay there, did I think about all the things I wanted and needed to do, the workouts I was missing, the podcasts, the music and book writing I wasn’t doing, and all the thousand and one things we all do that make a tapestry of our lives?  

No.  I lay there, struggling for breath and the recovery of my usual extreme wellness, yet thinking in the back of my mind that maybe- just maybe- my life was actually usually too busy.  Even though everything I do is pretty much what I want and love to do- at the end of the day, what really, really counts in making us what we are, our true selves?  

It’s not just our accomplishments, although those are important.  But what is far more important are all the times that you are just there- in the moment- experiencing your life, and the lives of your tribe all about you, and savoring and appreciating that, in and of itself!

Not the accolades you do or might receive, not the money you may make because of your hard work; I mean, all of that is nice, and even necessary in some ways- but at last, who really cares?  If you are ‘running and striving’ so hard in your life that you hardly notice what day it is, or where you are and what you are experiencing- you are missing out on your own life.

I won’t say I am glad I got sick, far from it.  But, as I sat there in that chair, I realized what it was to live in the moment.  Entirely, and painful as it was- I was right there.  There was no way to escape it.

And that’s when I realized that if only I could live the wonderful, vibrant, full-of-joyous sensations moments of my life, as I walk through the forest with my ski poles in the snow, or hit a perfect harmony with my singing partner, or when I’ve grilled a perfect steak- why, then I would be truly BEING, living in the NOW, and in a wonderful time that would in some way live inside me then forever!

That is the me that I want, living forever!

PJSC #127 podcast Live in the Moment

A lot of us tend to be type A’s, paleo people are not immune to this!  And, it’s not all bad; I mean we type A’s are driven to achieve, and this can be quite useful.  I can’t even imagine not wanting to exercise, but then I have done so daily for more years than I would care to count.
As for eating a proper, healthful, paleo type of diet- it is a desire to achieve that gives us the impetus to start living that goal of a really good diet.  And so it goes- by being driven in some sense, we accomplish very useful and important things in life.  But, it is easy to become a slave to achieving, just as it is easy to become a slave to sloth and idleness: once you start as a welfare person, either through a trust fund of else the government, the idea of actually working at anything seems utterly impossible to even start.
You have to learn to live in the moment.  Every minute of every day is not meant to be spent in “busy-ness”, an endless spinning of our wheels.  The really important times of life, the times that you will always cherish in memory, are those moments when you are literally in the moment, totally immersed in your life as it happens.  Often, this state comes to us easiest when we appear to be doing nothing: just relaxing with family and friends, sitting around a campfire or on our front porch, or just walking through the woods.  These moments are what really make up our lives!
Sure, when we are working really hard at something, whether it is doing a hard set of pull-ups, or sprinting barefoot across a grassy field in sets, we are very satisfied when we are done.  We have really accomplished something!  Our bodies are flooded with endorphins, are muscles are strengthened, body fat burned.  Great!
But, the real enjoyment of living comes afterwards, when we are totally relaxed, showered, and maybe heading outside to fire up the grill for some grass fed steak and baked sweet potato.  When we go for a slow saunter down the road with our dog and spouse in the evening, and we are just being there, in the moment.
It’s really not when we save up for a big vacation, go on a cruise, or buy that new car.  Those are fine, and can be worthy goals, depending on what you like, but it just is not the real stuff of life!   Life is simple.  Life is just being, enjoying the ability to move, to laugh, to feel the sun on our skin and cold water on our tongue.  And, life is all about people and relationships, family, friends, fellow church members and neighborhood folks- your tribe, if you will.
So go out and achieve!  Accomplish goals, big and small, write that novel, paint that picture.  Change the oil in your truck, mow your yard.  Work out, and eat a wonderful, clean, paleo diet, without junk food!  But remember that, at the end of the day, it is simply in living your life, and savoring it by being in the moment.  As Marcus Aurelius said long, long ago:

It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.