PaleoJay's Smoothie Cafe #80 Train Like...a Kitten!

PaleoJay’s Smoothie Cafe #80  Train like... a Kitten!

I know- you are going to think that I, your faithful PaleoJay, have gone off my rocker!  But I mean it- if there is ONE role model that we need in this fast-paced, sleep deprived, cortisol laden modern American and Western lifestyle that we have inflicted upon ourselves, it is the KITTEN!  Or the cat, or any version of any cat being, of any size...

How does a kitten live?  Or any cat, for that matter- they SLEEP about 20 hours per day!  GREAT START!  They get up, and they STRETCH methodically, and then get started on their day... usually, they will, if domesticated, go to their food bowl and eat.  If wild, they will start HUNTING.  When they find some game, they RUN IT DOWN, kill it, and eat it- starting with the organ meats.  (Great cat wisdom there!)

Kittens, in particular, are great role models, especially for those of us who have NOT followed an exercise regimen, or are definitely NOT “kitten” aged any longer-

Kittens know how to train to become cats; tigers or lions or panthers too!

They start by methodically exploring their own bodies and movement skills, and gradually expanding upon them.

First, they squirm and stretch- play act fighting and hunting with their little siblings, and with just random strings and reflections. (shadow boxing!)  And it works!

Their skills grow and grow- in a matter of weeks, and then a few months, a kitten becomes a fearsome CAT of whatever size it is meant to be, with gymnastic and athletic skills that are absolutely awesome to see!

“But Jay” I hear you saying, “How does this mean anything to me??”

Well, grasshopper, or preferably KITTEN: in a word- everything.

Go thou, and do likewise-

When you arise- STRETCH!  Religiously, every morning!  Have a regular routine, and   follow it- It is really important.

Next, eat a good, paleo-type of protein, and veggie rich breakfast!  Religiously, again, every morning!  Eggs, bacon, pastured steak and paleo coffee loaded with cream and coconut oil and cinnamon, a giant PALEO SMOOTHIE loaded with; well, with EVERYTHING a vital, strong human could possibly need or want!

EXCEPTION:  OR- if it’s a Sunday, or a day off, and you want to relax and don’t need to work, and want to emphasize your cat-like laziness and sleepiness-

Drink the Paleo coffee, and that is ALL!  You are going into your CAT hunting/fasting mode:  Lay around... stretch... enjoy the lethargy, the pure luxury of reveling in not having to RUSH!  Observe nature, pay real attention to it- the birds, the squirrels, the sounds of nature.  MEDITATE ON IT.  Your cat-like, primeval body is benefiting greatly- shutting down stress hormone (cortisol) production, revel in the very feel of the grass beneath your feet as you walk in the backyard.  Think about how you will spend the day- if Sunday, you can go to church and feel the spiritual recharge and exchange between you and the divine that will energize you- a real meditation!  Next, come home again, and, if hungry now, you can eat, but consider, just consider, kitten:  maybe you would like to work out now.  If you really listen to your body, you really just might feel this way- I often do...

A kitten knows when it’s time, intuitively.  You do too; you’ve just kind of... forgotten.

Last week, I knew I should NOT work out!  I didn’t feel guilty, I just KNEW that my body wanted to REST like a cat would.

Tomorrow, I know that I CRAVE a good workout!!  On the rings!  One the P-bars!!  Sprinting barefoot!!!

HARD but short!  It will feel fantastic- Like a cat running at top speed after hapless prey!!

And so, to get back to the EXCEPTION DAY:

Relax all morning, chill out.  Meditate. Pray. Stretch.  Enjoy the early morning (or late morning!)... Drink your Paleo coffee, loaded with ketogenic fats, and enjoy...

Go to church.  Meditate and pray again.  Enjoy the feeling!

Don’t eat- enjoy the feeling of not having to eat, to prepare or clean up, or anything but relax!  Prolong it!!


Converse, get in touch with family, read.  Maybe now you feel like working out?  I often do!!  SO DO IT!  Do your Perfectly Paleo Exercise!  Work your body, catlike, exploring all different was of moving and exerting yourself- NOT to “burn calories”, NOT to “get a pump”- just to move like a kitten or a cat- for pure FUN and the JOY of it!!

Afterwards, just like a Lion that has run down it’s prey, you will start to crave REAL, God made FOOD!  Because you now deserve it, and can make good use of it!!

So, DO IT!!

Let’s say it’s early, or mid-afternoon on a Sunday:  Fire up your grill!!  That’s what I do, routinely on these
exceptional Sundays!

Paleo Smoothie before blending

Put on a slab of ribs- (Imagine you just ran down the boar and killed it)

Add in some bacon- (from the same boar...)

Put on a roast of grass fed beef- (from a ruminant you killed after the boar)

And GRILL SOME LIVER from that same ruminant cow-like creature, to which you can add some Hollandaise sauce tomorrow morning for your workday huge paleo breakfast!!

I like to grill a whole weeks worth of meat on Sundays, and it is a blast to do so!!

Think about it: like a cat, you have relaxed, meditated, revitalized your feline body by stretching, contemplating, getting more-than-adequate sleep, and just plain getting in touch with your bad self!

THEN, you ran down your PREY, KILLED IT, (Figuratively speaking: you just bought it from your local farmer or rancher probably)- and now you are reaping the nutritional rewards for both yourself and your TRIBE of CAT-FOLK!  (Perhaps Catness is among them?  I don’t know...)

CRACK A BEER DUDE!  You have earned it!  It’s the Catnip equivalent of a human reward...

You need the carbs- and you have revitalized you, and YOURS!!

Party on, Catness.